Routes, The Lighter Side of Public Transit

by Heinz Hammer

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction by Stuart M. Hodgson,
Chairman and CEO of BC Transit

Acknowledgements
Chapter One – How Things Got Rolling
(by Brian Kelly)
  • In the VERY Beginning
  • Tallyho and Wells Fargo
  • From Horsecar to Horsepower
  • A Sparking New Form of Propulsion
  • The Trolley Car
  • From Open Car to President’s Car
  • The Trackless
  • Beans to Gas, Gas to Diesel
  • A Few of the Rich and Famous
Chapter Two – The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
  • Express Delivery
  • No Steroids Here
  • “Django is not Paying Today”
  • Not Guilty
  • Slugging it Out
  • Going His Way
  • How Much?
  • Where There’s Smoke…
  • Life’s a Ditch
  • Eggs from the Butterland
  • Wonder from Down Under
  • Leaving a Trail
  • Young Thief
  • Hands Up!
  • Nightmare on Peel Street
  • The Sting – Spanish Style
  • Double Whammy
  • Nagging Indigestion
  • No Chivalry
  • “Want a Smoke?”
  • Emergency! Emergency!
  • Bungling Bandits
  • The Power
  • Nessie’s Rival
  • Heroes Galore
Chapter Three – If We Could Talk to the Animals
  • Pigeon Fallout
  • Yes, Sir, That’s My Baby
  • Dog-Gone-It
  • Travelling Zoo
  • Feline Constipation
  • How Dry I Am
  • On the Buzzes
  • The Goldfish Boy
  • Full of It
  • Come Here, Puss-Puss, Nice Pussy!
  • The Stowaway
  • Duck Tale
  • No Justice
  • Finnish Kiss
  • What’s My Time?
  • The Flying Elephant
  • Showdown of the Giants
  • Dogs for the Deaf
  • Squirrel Power
  • Fit for a Pig
Chapter Four – Just Kidding
  • Ready, Set, Go!
  • Going my Way?
  • Sorry, Ma’am
  • “Blow for it!”…
  • First Class Only
  • The Other Side
  • She Liked it Hot
  • “Let’s Steal the Bus!”
  • Excuses, Excuses
  • Back Door Blues
  • King for a Day
  • Questions and Answers
  • “You go Lougheed Mall?”
Chapter Five – People on the Move
  • The Ripped Blouse
  • Aim – Fire!
  • Roll Call
  • Shave, Shower and Live Show for $ 1
  • Close Encounters of the VIP Kind
  • He Found It!
  • Miracle on a Bus
  • Flying Cows
  • Good Samaritan
  • The Flying Glove
  • Born Again
  • Minnesota 1, Chicago 0
  • Now You See It
  • Show and Tell
  • Subway Poet Keeps Riders on Track
  • The Older Twin
  • Tea Time
Chapter Six – Bits and Pieces
  • Dressed to Thrill
  • Running on Time
  • Need Any Help?
  • Tick, Tick, Boom, Boom
  • Philippine Jalopies
  • Moon on Broadway
  • Your Health or Mine?
  • Resurrection
  • Titbits
  • “Show me More!”
  • Skirting Disaster
  • Greek Charm
  • Turning the Tables
Chapter Seven – Love’n Stuff
  • Your Place or Mine?
  • Love on Rails
  • The Extra Touch
  • He Loves Me – He Loves Me Not
  • Kiss on the Run
  • The Mehan Bench
  • The Mock Marriage
  • Popping the Question
  • American Gondolier
  • “Where’s My Little Girl?”
Chapter Eight – Lost and Found
  • Have You Lost Your Mind?
  • The Lost Baby
  • Have You Lost Your Money?
  • Shifting Time
  • Lost in Time
  • Large Item Lost
  • Very Lost
Chapter Nine – HELP!
  • Hijacked!
  • Blowing the Whistle
  • Look Ma, No Hands
  • Trolley Folly
  • Clipped Wings
  • Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang
  • Cool, Man, Cool
  • Logical Language Lingo
  • Heavenly Road